I wake up early in the morning to
the sound of the chirping birds instead of helicopters for the first time in a
week because Chogum has officially ended HOORAY!!! Leaving day jitters started
to kick my arse early so a mandatory trip for bubble tea and Dim Sum was in
order to calm the nerves… honestly, I ask you, what would the world be without
Dim Sum? (let me give you a hint, it would be the suck!!!!!!!!) So a few pork
buns and a Bliss Bubble Tea with double Jelly (apple and grape if you were
wondering) we are ready to head of for the airport. Hoorahhh!!!!!!!!
I don’t know what it is about
Airports and Airport security but It doesn’t matter that I know I am not doing
anything wrong I am always sit in fear that they are going to stop and ask me
questions and possibly arrest me (I think this irrational fear stems from
owning an import for so long, after all we are murderous pillagers didn’t you
know?). When I was a small child, my mum always used to tell us to wave and
smile at the police officers (hmmm this could have stemmed my like for men in
uniform… I shall have to investigate this point at a later date) so now as an
adult it is some what engrained in me. I wonder if grinning like a maniac and
being super friendly makes me look suspicious, or just oddly retarded? “Hey look at that lady over there, she looks
special! That Asian Guy must be her carer” Maybe I should try this angle. It
may get me priority treatment and/or candy. I like Candy
First leg of the Journey was Perth
to Singapore and gee wizz with all this new fangled technology there was
something to keep even me amused and out of the boys face for the 5 hours of
our flight. I think I only stuck my finger up Kevs and James nose once (hey,
they turned the inflight entertainment off and I had been sitting still for
HOURS, Don’t try and act innocent and say that you wouldn’t have done the same
thing). I think I could get used to flying a full service airline. They give
you food and Drinks!!!!! AND you don’t have to pay for your entertainment!!!!
AND they have games!!!!!!! GAMES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And Pillows and a Blankets!!!! I have a chair, I am a King (Possible Borat
reference if you were wondering where you have heard that line before).
Brief stop over in Changi airport
and if you are wondering what its like, lets just say Beige and smells faintly
of cat piddle (I looked for the cats, but sadly I couldn’t see any. They must
have heard that I was coming and decided to hide from my Pats) After some duty
free shopping (or window shopping for me) and a trip to Burger King, we entered
the boring beige boarding lounge to start the second leg Singapore to Narita.
We were off, EXCITEMENT!!!!! Wrong!!!! So
here is my theory. If you are late and the plane has already pulled away from
the gate and you rock up, you can eat a dick and stay where you are because of
your own stupidity. Maybe its because its late and I have had very little sleep
but I am not very sympathetic and you making us have to turn the plane around
TWICE (once to pick up the idiots and a second time because of their fucking
baggage) makes you liable for a punch in the throat if I catch you. You have
been warned (I guess you can be thankful
that you are asian and all you kids look the same)
An hour delay on the tarmac and FINALLY we started to Taxi….
This is where the flight got some
what interesting for me. I have been separated from the boys (I suspect maybe
Kev had his hand in this one…..) and am sitting at the back of the plane all by
myself. I have no one to annoy and no where for my energy to go, So its turning into thoughts of irrationality.
What was that beep? Should it be making that noise? Fuck we are all going to
die and I will die a virgin!!!! What happens if my expensive new oil bra
expands during the flight and explodes? I wonder if Lassie meets her
love!!! See irrational. We all know
Lassie isn’t real.
Being on a flight with no one to talk
to gives you time to people watch (also translate this to Eaves Drop) and jesus
there are some arrogant arse holes in this world. Dude you paid the same for
your flights as I did. You aren’t anything special and hasseling the hosties
about things that are beyond their control only make you look like a cock head.
Yeah there, I said it. I think the world
is full of Cock heads. I wonder why people feel the need to whinge at people
that are serving them. Its not their fault that they changed our plane and now
we are on a shitty old one that doesn’t have the same entertainment as the last
one, Its not their fault that everyone
down the back of the plane wanted chicken so now you have fish, its not their
fault if you didn’t do your booking properly and now they don’t have a
vegetarian meal for you (that one is all
on you cock head) so please, stop being a Kuntz and leave the pretty ladies
alone. Play nice with the pretty ladies and they might refrain from spitting in
your drink (hmmm I think its possibly a good thing I do not work in hospitality
and food service anymore because I don’t think I have enough saliva for the contemptuous
people of the world)
What am I feeling right at this
moment? Excitement mainly, I cant wait for the familiarity of the country to
hit me when I get into Tokyo. I am looking forward to going back to a place
that made me feel more at home than I thought was possible, I am looking
forward to politeness and manners and delicious food. I am looking forward to
it all!!!
We have just checked into our
hotel, after 17 hours of transit, I think its time for some lunch and a nap.
Love and Green Pastures
Miss K
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