Priorities, Name dropping and a Flannel Choice

Its Wednesday night, its late, I leave the country in 4 days and so far my packing consists of putting my helmet into its little Uterus of a bag and making a half arsed list of shit I need. Life is about priorities right, and I think my priority up to this point has been about social outtings (because if you stay home you could miss something you know). Tonight was the Wake for Oz Hip Hop Legend Hunter SBX (RIP) who sadly passed away from Cancer last week, so instead of doing the dilligant thing and staying home to pack my shit, I headed off to the Civic to pay my respects. At this point in time I would like to say, I care little about Japan and if I was to die tomorrow I would die happy after the night that I had. Imagine a room full of Music Royalty (for this exercise you can choose your favourite Genre, it doesnt need to be Hip Hop) and you could touch and talk to all of them. This was my evening, I joked with Pressure about his "boyfriend" and then busted out some dance move with him after he finished grinding against Mortar and Swooned over Suffa.... he touched my elbow and smiled at me, I may possibly never wash again. This was my evening, this is my life.

Look, he is touching me, thats legit Yo!!!!

But really this has nothing to do with my Japan trip though, and now I have finished name dropping, swooning and have regained the ability to actually talk instead of make in-comprehensive clicks and garbles lets get back to the task at hand. JAPAN 4 DAYS, I AM ON IT 

To set the mood I will leave this here, play it as you are reading and it will put you in my head space... this is after all the final countdown

I have been making lists of what needs to happen before I go and slowly starting to tick things off, everyone asks if I am excited but I think I have been so busy that it hasnt really hit me that we are leaving in 4 short sleeps (short because this Nigga cant sleep). I think as an adult, people expect that you have it together and be organised.... ha!!!! fooled you world. Here are my guides and suggestions for fooling the world and hiding your "Holy Fuck I dont got this" face

Get your papers organised -  Bitches love paper so if it looks like it could possibly have something to do with your trip, photo copy it 3 times and give one to your mum. Because she didn't issue you forth into this world only to be left out of it now

Make Lists - This is a procrastinators best friend, by making a list you are doing something without really doing anything. Its a win win situation. Nice productivity team 

Join Government Web Site -  The government likes to know where you are incase you are going to die, visit www.smartraveller.wa.gov.au (yeah thats right only one T) for the 411. You can register your locations, where you are going and how they can contact you. I wouldnt suggest this if you are planning on drug trafficing though, the government doesn't need to know this (but I do? Possibly? Mates rates?)

Turn your Phone onto Roaming  -  Whilst being on the other side of the world might not be logistically doable for that Saturday night bootie call, its still nice to be thought of (and who knows you could set something up for your return). This will need to be done a few days before hand so that it has time to click over. I guess you don't have to take your phone, but I use my phone like a security blanket, I feel naked without it. And its cold in Japan, I don't want to be the Naked in Japan 

Get Travel Insurance - Cause you never know when you are going to get caught in a rain storm and your camera is going to die when you are flying out of the country (yeah fml). This also covers you for flights and possibly Zombie Invasions (N.B I am still confirming this). And lets face it, if you are up on the Spedastool with me, medical cover is a good idea.

Negotiate your Wardrobe -  Pack smarter, not er ummm heavier? As my mum always says Layer Layer Layer. You dont need a Gucci Dress and 10 pairs of sneakers for a three week trip to another country. Chances are you will never see these people again so it doesn't matter if you wear that same outfit 3 times in one week. Cause please children, life is not a fashion show. 

Advise your Bank -  There is a hawk that sits in my bank and looks at who is taking my money, the idea of the hawk eating my bank cards beacause I have transactions in Japan does not at all seem appealing. A tall heavily tattooed red headed women wouldn't do to well trying to beg in Japan, and lets face it I am saving my Kidneys for something important, Like a life time supply of red snakes and the whole back collection of my little ponies. Again Priorities people.

Get Some Entertainment - Without free access to Valium, its important to keep yourself occupied so you don't annoy everyone in your vicinity whilst travelling. Make sure all your technologies are fully charged, 17 hours is a long time to wait with empty batteries. Have a book ready to go and keep some candy on hand for bribing those shit head kids behind you to stop from kicking your seat. I was very lucky to have received this pack from Krystal, should keep me entertained for a while, it even has my name on it. Thanks Krystal you are amazing (P.S The Krystal in these posts is not for sale, she is mine so get your own)

With these fool proof Kerry Travel tips how can you fail. 

So whats left on my list I hear you ask? I guess the big one is PACK nakedness isnt what anyone wants to see. Also its time for tough decisions, with packing smarter not heavier I can only have one flannel, so which colour should I take? Will my Asian Twin be taking the same one? While Lassie finally meet the love of her life while saving Timmy from the mine?  

I guess we will have to wait for the next instalment to find out the outcome of these pressing questions 

Love and Hip Hops 

Miss K 

Lets get Excited.... soon my pretties 

  

Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something ummmm Refrigerator

So, we are 8 days out from Departure and most organised seasoned travellers would have started to pack or get organised... or just generally be doing something about something. I would like to consider myself a seasoned traveller so here is my spread of things that I have organised 

Something Old


I have had this helmet for a few years now, Its kept my ol' noggen safe and warm on the few times that I have used it. This one time I accidentally banged my head into my sunroof when my car got confused on which way it wanted to go... and as far as I know I didn't get the brain damages. The ears were given to me as a present from Krystal. She does spoil me...

Something New


This category can be filled with many of my latest acquisitions. Going on a trip is like the first day of school, you cant wait to get your new pencil case with your freshly sharpened pencils and your clean white pages... I love the smell of pencils

From years of alcohol abuse and possibly old age my memory isn’t as good as it used to be, so I was inspired to keep a journal on my last trip to Japan. There is something therapeutic about sitting in a room full of people and writing your thoughts on your surroundings. I like to think it makes me look stoic and arty (but possibly it just makes me look like an arrogant arsehole). Whilst using the googles they suggested that you get a book that inspires you to write. At the UpMarket this month I found this amazing note book, its smells of leather and rich mahogany and feel glorious to the touch. I’m excited to write about the debauchery that will ensue in this little beauty.

Growing up I was always that kid that no one wanted to play with or my cousins would fight over who would have to top to tail with me, as an adult this problem still may be present but I have a secret weapon. See now I have a job, I have the money to buy the things, and with the money to buy the things comes an opportunity to buy presents for people to make them be my friends. Here is my loot of bribes. The Japanese are the most amazingly friendly people that you will ever meet and its nice to be able to repay them for their generosity. Last year on a Subway a lady remarked to me that I didn’t have anything hanging from my phone and she took one of the charms off her phone and gave it to me so that I could hang it on mine (it was a flying Harry Potter car for those playing at home). I gave her a stuffed Koala and the look of joy on her face is enough to make me smile even now. We swapped email addresses, which leads me onto my next purchase.... 

I did Marketing and Product development at Tafe and my whore of a marketing teacher (she was married so clearly she put out, and clearly that makes her a whore) said that the most important thing that you can market is yourself. While most of the stuff that she sprouted went in one ear and out the other, this one thing has always stuck with me. And before my mother pipes up and makes a comment, YES last year she did suggest that I do this but I didn't listen, as most children don't. I met a most amazing guy from Texas called Justin (and if you sickos were wondering we just met, we didn't "meet") who was on Holiday in Japan to see his mum. I have never had such a great conversation with a random (and trust me I do have a lot of them) and after sharing a Maccas Shrimp burger he disappeared off into the rainy Roppongi Darkness (how poetic). I kick myself every day that I didn't have a pen or something on me to give him my email address or get his. But alas, we live and we learn and its probably better this way anyway because he wore boat shoes

Another exciting purchase was the above Helmet bag, see its cold in the land of the Japans and I dont want my Helmet to catch a cold. Also I think carrying a Helmet bag with team insignia through an Airport gives you instant rock star status. I dont know why but as I was writing that, the song Get Low comes into my head, The Sweat drips down my balls, now all your bitches crawl... thats right bitches CRAWL!!!!!!

Something Borrowed

I would like to take this opportunity to send a giant shout out to Chelle for lending me her travel wallet to keep all my important things (mainly receipts, half eaten pieces of chewing gum and one left sock, hey you never know when you are going to need a spare, dont judge me ok). I promise to keep it safe and fill it full of fun and take it around to show it the sites, maybe take it out for dinner or something, I like to treat my ladies right ;) 

Something... Refrigerator 

And here is a refrigerator.... look how happy this little guy is 

What this really translates to is the fact I don't have anything blue to take with me, so the old adage is incomplete... but alas we cant win them all. Actually no, I lie my new back pack is blue, its pretty awesome, full of space to put my things... but that refrigerator is so much cooler 

I guess its time now to get my shit together and start thinking about actually packing properly, but for now procrastination reigns

Love and Laundry Bags 

Miss K 

This is one of my Favourite Videos. Kumakubo owns Ebisu Circuit and is one of the most amazing down to Earth guys that ever was. The area around Ebisu was badly affected by the Tsunami and Earth Quake and he opened the track buildings up to give shelter to the people that had lost their homes. He fed them and housed them and personaly did food runs into the worst hit areas with truck loads of food. There really needs to be more people like him in the world 

There is no "I" in Team (but there is an "I" in Asian and we have one of them)

So it was brought to my attention that so far the Identity of the team seems to be veiled in some kind of magic secrecy. Is this to keep our real Identities safe from the Japanese Government? are we International Man (and Woahman) of Mystery? Super Heros? or am I merely to lazy/forgetful to have updated the world as to my mighty team mates. I shall let you make your mind up on that one...So without further ado I would like to introduce your to our Heros and Heroine!!! Wonder Women, Mr Miyagi and One of the Hanson Brothers 

Your Heroine 

This part will be played by me, Kerry (aka Wonder Women, STEEEVVVVEEEEEEEEE, Phantom, Gropezirra etc etc)

The Facts 
- Born 28 years ago in Fremantle to a nurse and a gas station attendant
- Has the attention span of a Gold Fish and an addiction to sugared treats
- If hungry, drives poorly, If full drives poorly, possibly just drives poorly as a general rule
- Likes cats, pork buns, bubble tea and Hip Hops
- Shouldnt be left alone in toy stores, night clubs, 18th Birthday parties or shopping centres (Heck anywhere really)

Aims for the Trip 
- Annoying Kev and James for 17 hours on the flight over
- Ripping an awesome skid and getting it on film
- Making a sign for Lozzle and Pie so they can see she is thinking of them
- Giving a new meaning to Gaijin Smash ;)
- Not totally sucking and having to wear the stack hat and oven mits

Mr Miyagi

Child Part played by Hector Van, the coolest most awesome kid in the world. True story

This role will be filled with everyones favourite person Kev (aka Mr Mijagi, Top Hat, Drift Monkey, Uncle Kev).

The Facts
- Born in a Wheel Burrow in a Forrest to a monk and a maiden some 30 years ago
- Has strength in his Pony Tail much like Samson of Biblical times
- Hopes to one day in the future own a white van
- Likes hats, Japanese School girls and Bubbletea
- Most awesome Drift Trainer known to man

Aims for the Trip
- Make Kerry and James into gay ass homo handbrake drifters (emphasis on handbrake drifting being gay!!!)
- Do Rodeo nuts whilst Skidding
- Buy some Panties from a Vending Machine
- Go nuts in Akihabara

The Hanson Tag Along

The final member of our team is James, small blonde tag along camera boy (aka Hanson, Piccachu, 3lite)


The Facts
-  Born to a Hobbit and Repunzel under a bridge 23 years ago 
- Wore corrective shoes and glasses at school 
- Is so excited about the trip that sometimes he pees a little 
- Loves his beautiful Girlfriend Emily 


The Aims of the Trip 
- Buy his Emily Princess many beautiful presents 
- Not to wake up in a bathtub after a party night
- Drop some mean skids to come back to be a drift God!!!!
- Spend obscene amounts of cash on stuff he definitely needs to survive 
- Make an Awesome Blog (which in no way will Rival this one for its awesomeness) which can be found  here

Disclaimer: These description were written by me and possibly could be fictional in order to tell a good entertaining tale 

So there you have it, meet the motley possibly unnamed crew that shall be terrorising Japan in 19 days. Now you can all put faces to the names and don't have to see the real Mr Miyagis' face as you are imagining Kev bleeding into sauce bottles. I am sorry for the sadness and despair I caused by not getting onto this sooner.

Love and Undies on the Outside

Miss K

 This video, whilst not Drift Japan related should give you an idea on who I am... Pretty much I am Steve the naughty monkey - lick lick lick 

Your chariot awaits, my lady

If we look back to episode one of this epic blog (if it was Starwars it would be, well Stars Wars, unless you are talking about the new Star Wars then it would be the Phantom Menace, which may I add could be prophetic in this situation. After all I am the Phantom.... you know the rest) we set a plan, we would go to Japan, we would drift Ebisu and we would get famous. I've seen Youtube videos of some crazy cats drifting on their shoes, or them fandangled Huffy Sliders things but lord knows, that all sounds like to much hard work and I 'er on the side of lazy so a vital part of this drifting plan needed to be a car. 

I will admit that in this part of the story I zoned out, because I am just a girl after all and girls don't know about cars *generic bimbo airhead laugh* and decided to leave it in the hands of Mr Miyagi. He sent a list of our requirements to Power Vehicles and the search was on!!!!! The boys spent hours trolling the auctions with high expectations and after a few weeks of unsuccessful bidding poor Kev was getting a bit stressed, but lady luck was on our side and we got a tip off... 

Whilst drunk at a Hip Hop gig last weekend (this is the same gig where Moondog J serenaded me with his harmonica and voice from heaven.... but that indeed is a non Japan related story and shall have to wait for another time) I got an email from a Mr Jared Brooksbank with some info on a matsuri car that was for sale on the JZX forums, it all looked too good to be true so I shot an email off requesting more info... at this time my excitement levels were rising ( *swoooonnnnnnn* harmonica*swoooonnnnnn*) and I could feel it in my waters that we were onto a good thing. After some tooing and frooing and a little bit of low balling we had ourselves a Deal!!!!!!!!!! We were now the proud owners of a Drift Sil80, a chariot fit for an asian king, his tall white queen and one of the members of Hanson (N.B Please see further down the page for more information on this statement). 

I would like to present you with the Team Zombie Sil80 (this shall be the team name for now, we are still in discussions apparently) she has a face possibly only a mother can love but in my eyes she has massive street cred!!!!!

Nawwww look at her isnt she pretty

Yes, thats an SR. I still stand by death before dishonour CA styles though

Lets hope my giant Gaijin Child Bearing Hips can fit into the bucket

What makes my baby tick

Welded Diff

Bucket Seat

Momo Steering Wheel

Omoni Oil Pressure Gauge
Omoni Oil Temperature Gauge
Water Temperature Gauge
Rev Speed Meter
Half Cage (safety first yo!!!!!)
Metal Suction Pipe
Front Mount Intercooler and Piping Kit
Strut Brace
S15 Injectors
ECU Remap
S14 or S15 Turbo
Outlet Pipe
Front Pipe
Yashio Factory Twin core (w/S14 rad as a spare)
Oil cooler w/ filter relocation
Aftermarket Exhaust System
Cusco Front Tension Rods
Ohlins Coilovers
16″ Wheels
Spare tires - one new pair

We got this or the tidy sum of about $3300 and that includes storage costs at the track before we get there. BARGAIN!!!!!!!! He had originally wanted $3400 USD  (which at the moment would be like $3600 AUD) but I managed to talk him down to $3100 USD, I think I am getting old because lowballing him made me hate myself a little bit and once all the negotiations had been finalised I wanted to email him back and tell him that we would pay his asking price, I would never be good at Poker it seems. 

As some of you may know, my dad is hilarious and regularily provides amusements with more than the average dad jokes (this could possibly be where my sense of humour comes from) and this was to amusing not to share with you, On posting a picture of my trusty steed on facebook he felt the need to give his take on things, I guess he likes to feel involved in what his favourite daughter is up to (yeah I am totally the favourite) 

• 
  
• 
  

  John Maiklem Looks like you've already test driven it , i told you not to send Kev over to do the legwork !
  

  October 3 at 11:09pm · 
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  Matt Cappellaro I'd recommend removing the rear hatch, but its going to be slightly cold, so maybe not.
  

  October 3 at 11:11pm · 
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  Kerry Wasley Just cause he is Asian doesn't mean he is a bad driver John :p that's very racist.
  
  Arghhhh I'm worried about the cold lol
  

  October 3 at 11:14pm · 
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  Mark Colborne Bring it back with you !!!!!!!
  

  October 3 at 11:28pm · 
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  John Maiklem If Kev can't drive because he's aisian and you can't drive because your a women that only leaves the mystery third companion , this does not bode well for the other driver's , spectators , bystanders , nearby residents and anybody / anything on , in or around the roads to and from the raceway . I will contact the authorities in Japan and tell them to shift their emergency resources from that trifling nuclear/ tsunami so called disaster to the imminent class 10 disaster heading their way !
  

  October 3 at 11:31pm ·  ·  2 people
• 
  

  Kerry Wasley Probably smart to give them a heads up. All our hopes rest on a young blonde boy, some what like that kid in the Never Ending Story, he can call my name and I can save the Universe.... Or something like that.
  
  I'm hoping that drifting can be learnt through transfer like that movie with the mermaid and the book... Or was she an alien? Anyway... You get the point
  

  October 3 at 11:40pm · 
• 
  

  John Maiklem The secret weapon is a young blonde boy , i will check the stock in the bunker cause it looks like the world as we know it is coming to an end and i thought global warming was our biggest worry ! The Three Stooges , the Marx brothers the Three Amiigos , now we have Top Hat ,Wonder Women and a third of Hansen (mmmmmm Bop ! ) sounds like this trio need an appropriate team name , any ideas ?
  

  October 4 at 12:02am · 
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  Kerry Wasley We should be called the awesomes because that's what we are!!!!
  
  You just wait when I take over Japan you will rue the day you doubted me
  

  October 4 at 12:13am · 
• 
  

  John Maiklem Cosider yourself to be Godzilla do you ?

So everything is set and locked in now

Flights - Check

Accomodation - Check

Tours - Check 

Super Awesome Happy Fun Time Car - CHECK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We are 21 days out and ready to rock.... get excited people Gaijin Smash is ONNNNNNNN

Now to finalise a team name, agree on an appropriate tow hook companion and start conditioning our liver, tough days ahead ;)

Love and a ball of fluff 

Miss K 

Now I have a car with a cage, I can so totes do this.... its safe right? Right??? Yeppppp!!!!!!

P.S Huge Huge Huge Giant thanks to Jared on helping me out with the car!!!! I will bring you back a maids costume or some used panties from the vending machine to show my appreciation. Nothing but the best for you yo!!!!!

So Yen, We Used to be Friends

For those of you playing at home, who may not be familiar with me as a person, here is a quick synopsis for you.

Kerry: (Verb)  A highly educated member of society that likes to keep abreast of world issues and the way that they shall effect upon her life and general well being. Also know to have a slight inclination to sugar and shiney things. All round Good Guy

Whilst some of the above is true and some is partly fiction there are some world issues going on at the moment that are forcing me to keep abreast (I generally keep two, but each to their own) and subsequently causing me a hell of a lot of problems. So I ask the world leaders "Yo!!! What you do to our economy Niggas?" If anyone has been following world Currencies over the last few weeks they would have seen the heart breaking story of a strong Australian dollar that has been neglecting its work outs and protein powders and all its mates have chosen to go to the pub instead of to the gym. In short, technical terms, as my dad would say "its Fucked"

Whilst getting ready for my holiday I did a planning budget (yeah I know... organised... scary) the yen was sitting at a healthy 82 and things in Kerry land were happy. Being conservative and being in a some what finance related job I knew that markets change regularly so I thought to myself, "Yes, I will do my Budget at 75, give myself some breathing room, it will be apples" So turns out that even my conservative budgeting and estimations were off the mark. The Yen cash rate has tumbled to 67!!!! At this point life is officially over

Below is an exert from a real conversation by your leading lady and her Mr Miyagi that illustrates the seriousness of the situation

Kerry: The yen just dropped to 73. I'm going to slit my wrists
Kev: I already started and am bleeding out into old tomato sauce bottles so I make less mess and so when they find me they find me they put away the saucebottles and they will say "who was the silly billy who left these out here" and when they use it on food they can taste my despair
Kerry: Good Plan. I am off on a hunt to find saucebottles

Taste my Despair...

The implications for us on a lower Yen are astronomical, our $4000 car is now $4750, the tours that we booked went from costing us $388 to $418 (and dont you worry there was a strongly worded email in relation to this, but that rant is for another post) and most important my $3 beer will now cost $4. How am I supposed to get drunk and attractive on these exorbitant prices? (I can hear all of your our in reading land breath a sigh of relief for the young boys that may be spared from my clutches due to my lack of booze...)

So for now, there is little I can do, but pray for a recovery and look for someone to buy my Kidneys (I have two, and I am not greedy, I am willing to share) So world leaders, if you are reading this and why wouldnt you, because it is awesome and educational please sort your shit out, I got shit to do and people to see and you are kinda getting in the way of that. 

Beware the Sauce Bottles

Love and Doing Words 

Miss K 

 Thanks to Luke Streat for this Awesome Video of Japan Times last year. I get sad about the Yen and then I watch these videos and go, well hell yeah, I may not be able to eat for 3 weeks and might end up sleeping on the street... but this will make it all worth it